Ten more reasons why you know 
you're obsessed with Knightmare
by Steven Webberley

1. When you are told that for dinner it is your favourite meal and you say 'Lovely' in you best Skarkill impersonation

2. When you play chess and your opponent loses and you say 'BONG!'

3. When you walk onto your paved garden patio and, pretending it is a floor puzzle, you cross the patio by sidestepping and stepping on only one tile each time.

4. When you play a board game involving being timed by an eggtimer (hourglass) and when the last of the sand trickles down, you say 'time up'.

5. When you call for a friend and you say their name quickly three times even though she/he heard you straightway.

6. When you go down a long corridor and move left and right as though you are dodging blades.

7. When you convincingly win a game and you smugly boast 'I enjoy gloating, comes naturally'.

8. When you are peckish and you chant out 'I hunger!'

9. When a friend comes in and you cry 'Quail intruder!'

10. When you are in hurry, and you spellcast a 'Speed' spell.

" If you have any of these symptoms, you are suffering from Knightmaritis