When Stiletta prised open her chest,

She found inside an annoying pest,

She shouted, "Oh God

It's Motley the Sod!"

And he said, "It's only a jest!"

The dungeon was open once more,

For commence of a quest as before,

The fire would burn,

But if they take a wrong turn,

They'll fall through a hole in the floor!

Level One was full of clues,

And many items to use,

Decisions to make,

And directions to take,

With plenty bombs with a lit fuse!

And so now we are in Level 2,

Where the dangers are waiting for you,

With a starving lifeforce,

You need food of course,

And some magic to help see you through!

Arrival in Level 3,

Where the undead roam around free,

Before imminent demise,

Spellcasting is wise,

I surely hope you agree!

The end of the quest is near,

With one final obstacle here,

With the Shield in your sight,

To protect you from fight,

It won't protect you from fear!

The end of your quest is a mess,

Where you make a mistake in distress,

The death is so ghastly,

Treguard says "Nasty",

D.I.S......M.I.S.S.

He felt it veraciously cruel.

Old blobs of nail varnish

Made his helmet tarnish,

(He stuck his hand in there, the fool!)

There, now you can archive it

When Lord Fear fell into his pool,

He felt it veraciously cruel

That you have had too much to drink?"

Although Sly tried quibbling

It didn't help his dribbling,

"LOVELY!" grinned Skarkill with a wink.

That you have had too much to drink?"

Although Sly tried quibbling

Said Skarkill to Hands, "Do you think...

I know this thread is for fun, but using a word that doesn't really rhyme, nor really exist, takes away the element of challenge, which for me is part of the fun. So could I please suggest changing 'Cheeks's' to 'treaties'?

Bzzzzzarp!

Assuming that's meant to indicate a wrong-answer buzzer, surely there are politer ways to express a disagreement with another forum member? If I've assumed wrongly, I apologise.

What else rhymes with "axes" anyway?

Flaxes, axis, praxis, parataxis, climaxes, relaxes.

Talking of smut...

To continue this thread, I've picked the more compelling option. Mainly 'cos the fact that I've left it in inverted commas implies something smutty!

While Lillith sat counting her sweeties,

A Goblin pinched one of her 'treaties'

She tugged on her lever...

Personally, I was content with Thanatos' line. So if no one minds, I'm going to use it as the basis for making a complete limerick, leaving the next contributor to follow on from the alternative 'lever' line if they wish.

While Lillith sat counting her sweeties,

A goblin pinched one of her treaties.

Said Lillith, "Good gracious!

That treaty's fallacious:

It spells my name 'Littith', with three tees."

While Lillith sat counting her sweeties,

A Goblin pinched one of her 'treaties'

She tugged on her lever...

"They're gonna taste gray-ate with Tony your may-ate,

Everyone knows Frosties tay-aste gray-ate,

Even ladies who way-ate, or a pi-ray-ate."

"Her English is too good," he said, "which clearly indicates that she is foreign.

Whereas others are instructed in their native language, English people aren'."

• Alan Jay Lerner, My Fair Lady

If your blonde won't respond when you flatter 'er,

Tell her what Tony told Cleopatara.

• Cole Porter, Kiss Me, Kate

It's a scheme of devices, to get at low prices all goods from cough mixtures to cables

(Which tickled the sailors), by treating retailers as though they were all vegetables.

• W. S. Gilbert, Iolanthe

Anyway:

Said Lillith, "Good gracious!"

I know this thread is for fun, but using a word that doesn't really rhyme, nor really exist, takes away the element of challenge, which for me is part of the fun. So could I please suggest changing 'Cheeks's' to 'treaties'?

Bzzzzzarp! Hitting the English language with a sledgehammer is all part of the fun. I seem to remember one day at school in a Latin lesson (Brother Mace would be impressed...) our task was to write poetry (in English - Latin would be far too hard) about some bloke called Horatius who beat an entire army single-handed - or something like that. I seem to remember a couple of lines of my effort read something like this:

*And so the knights used their axes

To make the bridge fall down in stackses...*

And I thought that was a stroke of genius. What else rhymes with "axes" anyway?

Then let out a bored hiss

[One more line, and this becomes the thread's 64th completed limerick! (Unless I've miscounted.)]