Who helped Dickon win the Crown?

Who shut the realm of Mogdred down?

Hordriss! Hordriss!

Who freed Elita from the box?

Who let Gundrada out the stocks?

Hordriss! Hordriss!

Who fills clue rooms with golden bars?

Who made that Barry Thorne a star?

Hordriss! Hordriss!

Who saves Treguard from his plight?

Who turns children into knights?

Hordriss! Hordriiiiiss!

Ever wondered what on earth that samurai in Series 6 was about? Well, so has Sylvester Hands. Official audio

[HORDRISS:]

A great philosopher once wrote...

[TREGUARD:]

Nasty nasty, very nasty

[SKARKILL:]

Ha ha ha ha ha

[SYLVESTER HANDS:]

There's a guy in the place

He's got a mask on his face

And he goes by the title of The Samurai

His friends call him Sammy and his acting's so hammy

And he'll hang about the place though nobody knows why

When he's there, I declare, he makes me feel scared

Though very much maligned and misunderstood

But though he looks muzzled I'm the one who's puzzled

I wish I knew why we got a samurai

You can see that he's mischievious, mysterious and devious

When he brandishes his sword while floating in the air

But once you know he's just a spectre of a magic spell

You stop and sit and ask yourself, "Well, why's he even there?"

Casting and dispelling, casting and dispelling

Sammy he is jammy and loves to muscle in

Stirring up a schism he's a mad anachronism

Does he really have a purpose, what the heck's he doin'?

How or why, how or why

Was there a samurai?

How or why, how or why

Was there a samurai?

How or why, how or why

Was there a samurai?

How or why, how or why

Was there a samurai?

Was there a samurai?

[SKARKILL:]

Has anybody got any victims?

Lovely

Ha ha ha ha ha

Ha ha ha ha ha

[HORDRISS:]

A great philosopher once wrote...

[TREGUARD:]

Nasty nasty, very nasty

[SKARKILL:]

Ha ha ha ha ha

[HANDS:]

I'm Sylvester Hands, leading light of the scene

Know what I mean, see

I created the vibe

I may not be a mage but at least I engage

The people who meet me, they know I'm alive

And Mr. Samurai, such a scary guy

When he's there, you know. But is it a show?

Though he only came twice it was not very nice

You see him in the air with a funny "Uh-oh"

A gentleman of Nippon, you won't catch him kippin'

And he's here on this address card so you'd think he's the best

Extraordinary fellow, I never heard him bellow

Never saw him in the flesh in any actual quest

When you're in town and Mr. Samurai's around

You can sense a presence in the sound of the crowd

There's only one question, so here's my suggestion

That when you see old Sammy it's time to shout loud

How or why, how or why

Was there a samurai?

How or why, how or why

Was there a samurai?

How or why, how or why

Was there a samurai?

How or why, how or why

Was there a samurai?

Was there a samurai?

Was there a samurai?

How or why, how or why

How or why, how or why

Was there a samurai?

Got any sushi? Sorted

[SKARKILL:]

Ha ha ha ha ha

Ha ha ha ha ha...