Although perhaps referencing poor Amanda's top three times was a bit much. We should try and find her...

I'm sorry for that. I wanted a theme to return to and got carried away. It's good in that case I didn't have enough lines to fit in:

*So Julie ended beaten, bruised and black-eyed like a panda

But she still looked so much better than that top did on Amanda.*

If she ever finds this website, she'll probably kill me. Divine justice would probably compel her to suffocate me with a certain item of clothing I won't mention.

Please Amanda, it's only meant as a joke. You can come and mock my wardrobe if you so wish.

Also the bit where they missed the first 'step' and had to jump the gap in Merlin's chamber. Why didn't the dungeoneer just STOP after making the jump? He kept walking forward and ended up falling into the pit!

And why are people having problems with spelling TREGUARD when his name was written in the credits at the end of every episode!

Treguard/Dungeon Master: HUGO MYATT

--

Spellcasting: E,D,I,T

Sorry I thought this topic was about how stupid the advisers/dungeoneers were in the series. Is there a separate topic about that?

I realise I should include this picture to explain several of the references.

I have often thought Knightmare would have been a better series if Treguard had rapped a bit more. At the beginning. Like the Fresh Prince. In a spinning chair. Tim Child. I speak for the whole Knightmare community.

Okay, here's my effort. It's Treguard reviewing the Quest of Series 3 Team 10 ("Julie and the Goblins", of course), pretty much in the same format as the Fresh Prince bit. (I can't believe I checked up on the Fresh Prince words on Google. My most embarrassing search ever is now "Fresh Prince 'This is a story all about how'".) Imagine Hugo on aforementioned spinning chair if it helps blot out the awful words.

*Now this is a story all about why

Julie from Leicester was doomed to die.

I'll just recap a minute, don't tell me to talk faster

Because I'm Treguard Dunshelm, the funky Dungeon Master.

Back in Level One on a quest for the sword

Got questioned by Brangwen and two good truths scored.

Sidesteppin', walkin' forward, turnin' right, stop

And all laughing loud at Amanda's starry top.

Got life force damaged on the wellway by a ghoulie

But it was Amanda's horrid outfit that really frightened Julie.

Got wrong one little riddle and missed out on magic

So they were doomed to a death both hilarious and tragic.

They went on through the level and escaped Mogdred's minions

Then into a long room where they had some strange opinions.

In the corridor nasty things then paid a visit

But instead of escaping they shouted out "Who is it?".

Got surrounded by goblins, it was lookin' real unpleasant

But they just tried to offer the evil creeps a present.

So as the goblins started to stab and thump her

I said "Ooh, that is nasty" but I meant Amanda's jumper.*

Yes, I know it's bad. But at least I tried.

Isn't it interesting how many people are posting to the guestbook saying that Knightmare is being shown on Challenge?. As it is mentioned on the front page of the site I would have thought it would be quite obvious)  ;D

I also like those who insist on people leaving messages/answers to their questions in the guestbook itself. On the left hand bar, "forum" is pretty much next to "guestbook", after all.

Unless I've just gone temporarily blind....

-Duncan (from the HBF)

Trebor64: That's genius and absolutely hideous at the same time.

Nice to know that they REALLY cared, eh?  

...that's almost as bad as the really obvious details.

Oh yeah, and Nic - I had the same problem too: even when I put in huge letters on my site, "THIS GAME WILL NOT RUN UNDER WINDOWS ME OR XP!!", I got constant forum messages: "will i be able to run this game i am running windows xp"... sigh!

They whistled for Motley and when he came near, the mine cart said fresh and had dice in the mirror!

If anything they thought that this ride was free, but they thought na forget it: go on to level three!

Ok I'm no Eminem but you get the idea!