Official recordingl* (I, Don Quixote from the musical Man of La Mancha)

Hear me now, oh thou bleak and most challenging realm

Thou art based on a blue screen none see

Time is right for advent'rers with knapsack and Helm

And thirsting to be on TV

I am I, Treguard Dunshelm

Lord of Knightmare Castle

My quest any fool cannot do

So don't die dungeoneering

Through tunnel and clearing

Or I'll say "Ooh nasty" on cue

I'll say "Ooh nasty" on cue

Could get quite gory for you

I'm Pickle, yes I'm Pickle

I'll follow my master like a fan

I'll tell all the realm proudly

His beard's real but - not his tan

Hear, behemoths and wizards and servants of fear

For your dastardly doings will pass

Thanks to blindfolded children I'll send forth from here

While I stay behind on my.. throne

I am I, Treguard Dunshelm

Lord of Knightmare Castle

My quest any fool cannot do

So don't die dungeoneering

Through tunnel and clearing

Or I'll say "Ooh nasty" on cue

I'll say "Ooh nasty" on cue

Could get quite gory for you

*Versions by Scott Bakula and John Barrowman are also around. You might find one ever so slightly more accomplished than the other.