I'm planning to put up an "accumulated wisdom" page on my website, compiling some of the wisest truths ever uttered in the series.

Here's some quotes to be going on with...

"When the going gets cold, the tough get frozen."

"Life goes on... or not."

"You smell like something the cat brought up!"

"Any decision is better than indecision. Well, almost."

"There's only one way to get out [of a monster's stomach]. Well two actually, but we won't go into that!"

"Can you try giving a straight answer for once?"

"Maybe."

Funnily enough I had the same idea a while back. I came up with these ones:

"You can always trust something with its head missing." (Gundrada, Series 4)

"You can't sign a peace treaty with a Pooka." (Treguard, Series 7)

"If you invent something new, give it a really pretentious name - everyone goes overboard for it." (Lord Fear, Series

"Thank badness for that!"

CEDRIC

Best line: "Now personally, I can't stand rudeness!"

My favourite: "Stick it in your knapsack!" Only Cedric could make a gift sound like an insult.

SYLVESTER HANDS

Best line: "Oh, if it ain't got any alcohol I'm not interested."

For me, though, Sly's funniest moment is when he's making his excuses to Lord Fear for boozing on the job - the way he goes "I do lots o' walking!" in a really pathetic voice always cracks me up. g

SIR HUGH DE WITTLESS

Best line: "Opposition? Never heard of him!"

My favourite: possibly "Well, enough o' the girlish vapours, now let's get to the rescuin' part!" I love that scene with Gwendoline - the way he just slings her over his shoulder, kicking and screaming is pretty hilarious, especially as she was such a humourless character most of the time.

JULIUS SCARAMONGER

"January? Oh, come for the sales, have you?"

ROTHBERRY

"Information? I could probably give you some information, like, um, the melting point of some metals." Genius ad-lib!

RAPTOR

(Whispered in the dwarf tunnels) "Rhark - you stop playing with that. It be dead!" Generally Raptor just annoys me and I struggle to make out what he's saying, but that line greatly amused me when I noticed it.

"Ah yes, the lootings and the pillagings, and the bonkings and the tonkings on the head ofcourse. Well this is the orders you know."

Top banana, that one.

One of the simplest but most effective Scenes I have ever seen on Knightmare. You don't ALWAYS need cutting edge Graphics.

Totally unexpected and brilliantly said!

Majida: "Don't you ever answer a straight question?"

Treguard: "Maybe."

Motley: "Your leg over and bosh your in."

http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Knightmare

"It's a very nice boat"

Barry, speaking to Greystagg, about the rowboat"

Exchange between Barry and Sylvester Hands:

"If you were strong, you'd be able to capture us both. This is a strength potion."

"Is it beer?"

"Well, more or less. Tastes like beer, anyway."

"Oh, no, I can't, I promised 'is lordship."

"No, there's no alcohol in it, so he won't mind."

"Well, if it 'asn't got any alcohol I'm not interested."

**"Cliff seems to have come to rather a pointed end" **

Treguard

"That's 'ands, like feet up the other end of your body, that's my little joke!"

Sylvester Hands (who else!).

And Treguard's...

"Welcome, Watchers of Illusion, to the Castle of Confusion..."

"Temporal disruption imminent!" (This always gave me the shivers... Oooohhh.)

I f it's not latin, it's not my fault. That's just what was on screen when I watched Knightmare with subtitles. But then whoever was doing the subtitles was a bit deaf. Remember the red dragon, "Balshebar?" And the terrifying "Maya Men"!

And don't let's even think of mentioning Mire Men!

Lord F: "Zolapse caralama!"

And now, who can tell me what that spell did? First right answer wins a gold star.

Hordriss: "Carascarm!"

Brollachan: "But I know so little, I know almost nothing."

LF: "Oh great! When you meet Sylvester Hands, you'll find you have a lot in common!"