Parody of Hit Me With Your Rhythm Stick by Ian Dury and The Blockheads

[Drassil]

A bloodthirsty watcher eggs on Cedric in Series 2 (as he's about to clobber Neil), Grimwold in Series 3 (as he closes in on Kelly) and Fatilla in Series 4. Based on Hit Me With Your Rhythm Stick by Ian Dury and The Blockheads (a band whose lyrics I've parodied before). Original lyrics; official video

In the caverns of Level 2
At the wellway next to you
Is a team without a clue
How to spell things right on cue

Hit him with your quarterstaff
Hit him, hit him
Shout, insult him, have a laugh
Hit him, hit him, hit him
Hit him with your quarterstaff
Hit him twice and make it half
Hit him, hit him, hit him

In a room on Level 1
Is a quest that's all but done
Need a crayon, they've got none
Time for Grimwold, nowhere to run

Hit her with your ogre's club
Hit her, hit her
There's a helmet, she won't blub
Hit her, hit her, hit her
Hit her with your ogre's club
Make sure Festus gets some grub
Hit her, hit her, hit her

Hit him, hit her, hit them

Near the pink and purple hearth
In the ruins of old Dungarth
Guarding wells or guarding paths
Send them home for early baths

Blip them with your blipping stick
Blip them, blip them
Hurry, they might think you're thick
Blip them, blip them, blip them
Blip them with your blipping stick
Blip them, blop them, don't be slick
Blip them, blip them, blip them!