Series 5, Quest 7. Brother Mace goes to attack a goblin before realising it is dungeonner Christopher.

Series 5 Quest 7

By Keith McDonald

Team 7: Christopher, Paul, Keith and Ciaran from London.

The seventh quest of Series 5 was for the Crown and lasted 40 minutes.

Knightmare Series 5 Team 7. Christopher, the dungeoneer.

Level 1

Christopher begins in the descender, which takes him further into Level 1.

Knightmare Series 5 Team 7. Chris takes the descender to the heart of Level 1.

He arrives at the inn of the Crazed Heifer, where he meets Motley.

There have been a number of spatial as well as temporal shifts since last season. The only thing we can say for certain is that Chris is somewhere deep in Level 1.


Motley provides a 'menu' which is a scroll. It reads: 'Knowing her name gives you the power. In a low place take the high road.'

Knightmare Series 5 Team 7. Motley helps Christopher in the inn of the Craved Heifer.

He accompanies Christopher to a courtyard, where they narrowly avoid a pair of goblin scouts on the upper deck.

Motley shows the dungeoneer how to use a spyglass.

Spyglass: Sylvester Hands has not caught up with the dungeoneer yet. Fear gives him the causeway code and warns him to watch out for Elita.

Knightmare Series 5 Team 7. Motley helps Chris use a spyglass.

Motley gets scared as they are caught watching and dashes off. The team decides to take a red gem and a jar of honey, leaving behind a bone.

Deeper into the ruins, Christopher finds a chest. Elita is hiding inside.

Pickle: "If she gets any ruder, her tongue will grow grass on it."

Knightmare Series 5 Team 7. Chris faces the rude toungue of Elita.

As Christopher has Elita's calling name, she offers him the password if he promises not to summon her.

The team uses the sequence from the spyglass to cross the causeway.

Skarkill emerges from behind a rock. He takes the red gem and the honey, but a swarm of bees attack him. Christopher escapes.

Knightmare Series 5 Team 7. Skarkill threatens Christopher with his irons.

The team use Elita's password to bypass the Blocker.

Brother Mace is waiting at the gate, which leads to Smirkenorff.

Brother Mace: "All you and your comrades have to do is earn your ticket, and I will issue you with a boarding pass."

Knightmare Series 5 Team 7. Brother Mace tests Christopher's general knowledge while Smirkenorff awaits.

The team answer all three of Mace's questions correctly. Mace helps Christopher aboard for a flight to Level 2.

Level 2

Elita greets Christopher upon arrival. She says the landing pad is the only way in or out of Level 2.

Chris must find a firestone and get back to Smirkenorff if he wants to reach Level 3.

Knightmare Series 5 Team 7. Elita addresses Christopher after Smirkenorff lands in Level 2.

Elita: "There's one somewhere on this level. Aesandre the Sorceress has got one frozen away, so you're going to need some magic to free it."

In the next chamber, Chris finds clues. The scroll reads: 'Fair trade is no robbery.'

Knightmare Series 5 Team 7. A Level 2 scroll reads 'Fair trade is no robbery'.

Spyglass: The sorceress Aesandre warns Lord Fear about his tone. She says the trap has been set. Fear provides a colour code for the causeway.

Aesandre: "May I remind m'lord that I am not one of his leeches... What Aesandre does is to please Aesandre."

Christopher takes a pouch of silver and a feather, leaving behind a green gem and a jester's folderol.

Knightmare Series 5 Team 7. Christopher meets Julius Scaramonger in Level 2.

Julius Scaramonger is trading in a marketplace. Chris asks him about spells. Scaramonger warns him off, offering a potion of impurity.

Christopher presses for spells, so Scaramonger offers a choice, CHANGE or SWITCH.

Chris buys CHANGE in return for silver.

Knightmare Series 5 Team 7. Christopher turns into a goblin trying to dissolve a block of ice.

Next, they find the firestone encased in ice. They spell-cast CHANGE but it turns Christopher into a goblin!

Chris tells the team not to dispel in case the change was needed later. (Impersonating the Opposition was introduced in later series.) They proceed without the firestone.

Knightmare Series 5 Team 7. Brother Mace prepares to strike Christopher, believing him to be a goblin.

Further into the ruins, Brother Mace prepares to strike Chris with his staff.

The spell cannot be undone, so the team must persuade Mace that Chris is a dungeoneer.

This spell is obviously cast-locked - that's a serious matter. Therefore, you should find someone who takes nothing seriously.

Brother Mace

Knightmare Series 5 Team 7. Brother Mace ponders options for Christopher in his cast-locked spell.

The team need Motley's help. Mace could have summoned him using the jester's folderol, but the team don't have it.


Christopher doesn't have the password for the blocker. The team tries the colour code, but Chris repeats it incorrectly.

The blocker swoops.

Knightmare Series 5 Team 7. Christopher is swallowed by a blocker.

Treguard: "Motley would have given you the password, but you just couldn't find him."

Hear from the team

In April 2001, advisor Paul signed the Guestbook:

Knightmare was really cool and should still be on in my opinion. Nothing has ever come close!


Knightmare Series 5 Team 7. Paul, an advisor.

In August 2003, advisor Ciaran signed the Guestbook:

Noooo!! You've just informed my friends that Series 5 is soon to be repeated. I was on Series 5 and safe to say it'll be embarrassing for 12-year-old videos of me to be floating around.


Knightmare Series 5 Team 7. Ciaran, an advisor.

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