Blimey, that's the second nice review of this fic I've received out of the blue in as many weeks! Thank you for sharing such detailed thoughts. I'm not as fond of the story as I was at the time (having since read everyone else's Knightmare fanfic), but I had lots of fun writing it, so I'm glad to hear some other people enjoyed it too.
I can't remember if I gave any thought to the life force clock! There's no way my fantasy series would include that damn pie, though. I'm sure they would have reinstated one of its earlier incarnations, or introduced a new one along those lines.
LOL re: turning a blind eye - I don't actually recall if I chose that phrase deliberately or not!
Yes, I have learned a lot of storytelling tips since I wrote this - I'd never really studied creative writing before, so I had no idea about POV and how to show instead of telling, etc. I've been trying hard to get my head around all that stuff. No worries about pointing it out; I never said constructive criticism was unwelcome, I just wasn't ready for overwhelmingly negative reviews!
I wrote a long character-based fanfic not long after this one. It's got a bunch of ideas I love, but the writing leaves a lot to be desired (for reasons like you mentioned here), so it's taking forever to knock it into shape. Very frustrating when you have a great desire to write but you're not a natural writer. I must have at least half a dozen stories in my head, but finding the best way to express them is another matter entirely.
Oh, I didn't realise it was my fic that made you notice the missing scene in yours! Haha. Glad to have been of service!
Thank you in particular for the very flattering remarks toward the end of this review! I like to hear about people's favourite lines/moments ("mystic mug" just wrote itself and still cracks me up, plus it would have been quite a topical joke with the National Lottery in its infancy!). The final encounter is perhaps a bit too wordy in the end, but yeah, I just wanted it to be more satisfying than some of the ones we saw. As for the suggestion of an audio adaptation, I'm not sure it's actually good enough for that, but I'm not against the idea if anyone wanted to.
