Parody of The Bare Necessities from The Jungle Book

Drassil

Series 3. A team gets to Level 3 and Treguard gives them advice to the tune of The Bare Necessities from The Jungle Book. Official clip. Inspired by the discovery that Rayner Bourton (Skarkill/Julius Scaramonger) has narrated The Jungle Book.

[Treguard]

Look for the sprig of energy

The simple sprig of energy

And when you see one, hurry: they're not rife

I mean the sprig of energy

That's somewhere here on Level 3

And touch it for the energy of life

Wherever you wander

Wherever you roam

All this is the cellar

Of my great home

With millions watching on TV

To see if you win Series 3

So do look out for the magic plants

And then advance

Don't be in trance

Then wait a mo or two

[Advisor]

Magic plants?

[Treguard]

You'd better believe it

And you're going to love the way they flicker

The life force energy increase will come to you

Will come to you

Look for the sprig of energy

The simple sprig of energy

And when you see one, hurry: they're not rife

I mean the sprig of energy

(Not sure what plant it's meant to be)

And touch it for the energy of life

Now if you meet Mogdred

And he gives you a scare

And to you a sword sped

Will next time beware

Don't fear his sickening stare any more

If he summons Kaa

Try to reach the door

But if you've paths without a door

And you have to pick from a choice of four

Then I hope you have a clue

[Dungeoneer takes helmet off and sees chromakey void]

Golly, that's b-lue!

[Advisor #1]

Doors, doors... er, and how about the wizardry?

[Treguard]

Somewhat patchy. Fools risk defeat

And so you'd better be an ace at riddles too

And answer true

[Advisor #2]

How about getting a great deal bolder now we're down here, OK?

[Advisor #3]

Yes, we should scare slower

[Advisor #1]

Yeah, Knightmare, that's it

[Dungeoneer mesmerised by the bluescreen]

Ah, this is beautiful...

[Advisor #1 making notes]

Right, scarce food

Guys, we need to get to a sprig when we're in a rough patch

[Dungeoneer]

There's lots of dungeon blue...

[Advisor #1]

Right, onward. Yeah, let's be fearless. [Muttering as he writes] Mmm. And let's find a sprig

[Treguard]

Well team, you are sounding driven

So don't try turning back, don't do it

Keep your guard in my backyard

'Cause this is no First Level kitchen

And if you don't react

You could end up charred

As you spend your time looking around

It's enemy folk who may be found

Like cavernwights and the dread Morghanna

There'll be no elf to bring a banana

And Merlin's spells are few

A sprig of energy is what will succour you

And that's the lot. Well, I hope your pluck holds out...