Musical Parody

Cheers! I was surprised to find this hadn't already been done, as it seemed both obvious and familiar - perhaps I vaguely remembered seeing the one you linked to. Took me a while to think of something that would fit, but I quite like how it turned out! Amusingly, your parody now seems like a response to mine.

Pooka, too much information. Natalie (can I blow your cover by using your real name?), thank you very much. As you might have guessed, it was inspired by Peter Kay's Car Share.

Drawing inspiration from the parody 'Reasons To Be Fearful' in Charlie Brooker's 2014 Wipe. Original lyrics, official video It is a dungeon path you tread Don't let your Life Force go to red x5 Reasons to watch Knightmare with tea Never need a brolly Cedric and Folly The mining trolley, or cart Hammers on troll heads And Bhal-Shebah's red Looking upon Mogdred The dice room start Playing with a plunger Getting rid of hunger Mister Scaramonger: will they buy it? Potions on the table, always read the label Guildmaster from Fable: Hugo Myatt From Lissard into Marta The levels getting harder Melly and Gundrada, in the stocks Skarkill when he's hobbling Sylvester when he's nobbling Christopher the goblin, eaten up by blocks The choice of two doorways, better if it's more ways When you got through the four days to reach Friday Elves being cheeky The doors that sound so creaky Casual fan or geeky, come and play Reasons to watch Knightmare with tea Reasons to watch Knightmare with tea Reasons to watch Knightmare with tea Reasons to watch Knightmare With your tea Reasons to watch Knightmare with tea Leaving out a letter Outfit of Stiletta's Tricky riddle setters Dickon versus Malice Pieces of the Chalice Fear dressed up as Harris Ariadne's dinner Level 3 and winners A boy you know from Pinner Merlin, Motley, Pickle The serpent's tongue to lick all Simon's big fall Spells that need dispelling Passwords that need telling And the guarded chambers with a well in Looking in a spyglass Dragons on a fly-past Dungeoneers who die fast Teams in losing status Bell at the hiatus Treguard is the greatest Victims of Morghanna Finding a banana Action, humour, drama Reasons to watch Knightmare with tea Reasons to watch Knightmare with tea Reasons to watch Knightmare with tea Reasons to watch Knightmare With your tea Yes yes, be sure There are lots more More reasons to watch Knightmare Brother... Mace

I particularly enjoyed this! A clever and amusing use of a great song...

It's Series 7 and Smirkenorff has decided to get choosy about the fare. Lyrics, video I've been flyin' these skies so long Hearin' the same old bongs I know every crag in these dirty great rocks of Bruin To get you from here 'cross to there I usually ask for a fare Like some metal or mints There's been a lot of compromisin' But from now I am advisin' That I'll only fly for a gem that's shinin' at me Like a firestone now, boy Red and bright in my saddle if you want to make me go I'd like a firestone now, boy Not more gold and silver from children I don't even know No longer will I stoop - swoop - so low Well, I really don't like Lord Fear And I didn't speak for a year If you don't mind my spine, dungeoneer, then I'll take you the wrong way And one day I'll retire to a pit With a sometime jester and a dungeoneer sharing their wit With a subway token and a dollar tucked inside my shoe It may not sound too enterprisin' For my pension I'm advisin' That I want a vault full of gems that shine up at me...

What awaits a would-be dungeoneer. Original lyrics, music video So off it goes again A week of school and pain With maths and exercise But Children's ITV could bring you liberty Escape and fantasise Gather three friends with advisory powers Get letters sent Go go Then you might be in the game of jesters Dodge the holes In some other realm you'll be sent on a quest Watched in a chest Or pool or mirror In some different time you'll be helped find your way And "sidestep" they'll say Left eh? You'll see the screens of blue And grace the green room too Inside the studio The fabric of Knightmare, the watchers unaware Of all the truths you know Brothers at home, watching and rooting You're stars in children's eyes Fame at your school Fame for your family Fame for you In some other realm you'll be sent on a quest Watched in a chest Or pool or mirror In some different time you'll be helped find your way And "sidestep" they'll say Left eh? You hope you won't falter (You dread being outclassed) You dread being outclassed You may win this thing If you're skilled and stealthy The camera is on The dream is reality Beat Level 3, be the game's big cheeses Fame for you...

You're life won't be richer for reading this parody about dungeoneer Ben from Series 6, but the original song, if you've never heard it before, is another matter. There's no lubbing of the land anymore The sea is behind and and the ship is creaking Please won't you find him a door He can't see One man he can hear Know it's not Lord Fear You've put him in the path of Nemanor Into the galleys below And the lair of a spider's where they sent Ben to Back with the astrolabe he goes And he's free In thanks the captain grinned well Whipped them up a WIND spell Sent them from the brine to Mines of Gore 'Cause they got an astrolabe for Nemanor Nemanor Nemanor

I have already worked out the chorus for a Knightmare parody of We Are The Champions. And now, the entire parody. Original: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=04854XqcfCY I've seen it lose Time after time Beat by The Simpsons In a TV poll crime What will it take Not to rank low? Radio Times will spare Treguard's disgrace If we trump Po We are the victors, we are 'Cause Knightmare's the greatest by far We are the voters Who smashed the quotas No time for floaters 'Cause Knightmare's the champion Of the poll Dipsy's disembowelled And Chip n' Dale fall Then we beat ducks and Aardman and everything by Warner Bros We'll thrash them all And if Sooty, Ant or Declan Thought they'd be champ Then they really should have realised that we Knightmare fans would vote 'Till all of us got cramp

Finally my favourite sad and equally uplifting song of all time gets the mashi makeover! It's a real conglomerate of ideas but is equally eclectic as the original imho. See the years, how quick they've flown But it's been off tv far too long It never started big We watched along and we were glad The first day that CITV showed it, we should've twigged Then the next series came And we hurried home from school that day Saw many a team die Came running' in all excited Even made sure we recorded it ourselves And we watched till we cried Temporal disruption meant we had to part Kinda cool and kinda smart and we loved it so And then we got a convention, twas something special Saw us all meet up in Norwich some months ago And it would sure entertain us When we saw Lord Fear and stayed up late 'Cause we would know That we'd been sittin' there and laughin' Over some improvised and crazy late, late show And Hugo, we miss you And we're bein' good And we'd love to see more Knightmare If only we could We saw all 8 series, it wasn't a a fad And so entertained, it was never bad BUT was such a spell needed instead of TRANSFORMATION But Mogred carried through And Helen didn't feel too well The series ended unexpectedly And got us all sad and teary Nothing more we could do or say No more Treguard, Lord Fear or even Majida We'd even have had more Grimaldine So it could stay And Hugo, we miss you And we're bein' good And we'd love to see more Knightmare If only we could So many a day spent at home Watched with friends or all alone The greater game Now all we have is memories of Hugo And we rewatch it now on Challenge and call Elita's name Hordriss was a powerful mage Sidriss dithered and Motley played And our love didn't stop And Knightmare stays miles ahead Of any other kid's tv instead That we all loved See the years, how quick they've flown But it's been off tv far too long It never started big We watched along and we were glad The first day that CITV showed it, we should've twigged

[It's late in Series 6. Sylvester Hands has been summoned to Mount Fear and is holding a skull. Lord Fear is holding a scroll.] Sylvester Hands: Your lordship, I got you a pressie. This skeleton 'ead. Lord Fear: You know me too well, Hands. But I'll let you keep it as a memento mori. SH: A what? LF: A reminder that one day, I will probably kill you. SH: Oh. I found it when I was cleaning out the goblin pens, like you asked. Got the rest of the bones too if you want them. LF: Oh yes, the goblin pens. That explains why you smell like half the Dungeon's done its business on you. And speaking of business, I have here the results of your performance review. [Hands starts to look nervous.] LF: Now you can expect me to be brutally honest. Not painfully honest however. I save that for special occasions. [Lord Fear opens the scroll.] I'll read it for you, shall I? Since you have trouble reading my handwriting. And indeed any writing. [Pause.] Across all categories, Hands, you are one step ahead of a pile of dung. [Another pause. Hands looks even more nervous.] LF: That's it. And I have to say, that I am seriously... [Hands is quaking.] LF: ...Impressed. [Hands stands there in silence, dumbfounded.] LF: Hands. Hands! Your jaw's dropped. SH: Oh. Sorry. [Hands bends down and picks up the skull's jaw.] LF: I really am impressed. One entire step ahead of dung. You've smashed your target by nine-tenths of a step. SH: Thank you, yer lordship. I'm gobscamb... I'm gombasced... I can't believe it. LF: Frankly, nor can I. So you'd better tell me how you did it. [Hands thinks back, remembering his victory in capturing January in Quest 4 and how it wiped away previous humiliations. Then he sings. Parodying One Step Ahead by Nik Kershaw. Video, lyrics] I catch my breath, after Sidriss caught my eye I caught Matt too (until he called that samurai) Since they cannot all be charmed I must always be armed With a rope that some rope-maker spun I scratch myself, waiting for another one (The scratching's fun) I lurk all day and I stink all night I broke my toilet, but that's alright 'Cause I took my rope and pulled it tight To be one step ahead of poo I think to myself, don't want to be the village fool I am Hands like feet, I don't want defeat Want a house of gold and jewels So I got up before noon an' I called myself Coonan I thought that I'd got one for sure But not this time So I sat and thought some more (In some manure) I lurk all day and I stink all night I broke my toilet, but that's alright 'Cause I took my rope and pulled it tight To be one step ahead of poo Don't want a good cry Don't want to be some sad, useless dope Won't use my head I won't plot. Instead I'll just use my rope Yes, brawn was best In January's quest (His lordship's impressed!) I lurk all day and I stink all night I broke my toilet, but that's alright 'Cause I took my rope and pulled it tight To be one step ahead of poo x3

Thank you. I'm glad. It's quite coincidental that Lauren Bacall, widow of Bogart and quoted in the original song, has been in the news since I wrote the parody.

Your welcome!

This is a perfect parody! Love it.

This is just the main chorus but it's something I improvised a few minutes ago. Shroud, shroud, there is no doubt, This isn't how it is cast about Come on, I'm talking to Neil, Come on... As you can see, I'm no Mozart but I hope you get it.

I'm suddenly reminded of a product I once saw on Dragons' Den for helping babies not to slip down in their high chairs. It was called the Baby Grippa. P.S. For reference, the Balamory theme song and original words can be found here. Yes I remember that Dragons Den episode. The Baby Grippa didn't turn out lovely!

Said Granitas of Legend to the Brangwen-Shee man I ain’t been a riddling since I don’t know when Said the Brangwen-Shee to Granitas of Legend Oh yeah Granitas you don’t Riddle like yer use to. That’s Truth Malice, That’s Truth Malice, That’s Truth Malice, Everybody think I’m crazy but your still my baby, baby It’s the truth Malice Said Folly The Fool to Gretel The Maid hang around baby and I’ll kiss you after a while Said Gretel The Maid to Folly The Fool Kiss me now baby and I’ll hang around later. That’s Truth Malice, That’s Truth Malice, That’s Truth Malice, Everybody think I’m crazy but your still my baby, baby It’s the truth Malice Said The Brollachan to Snapper-Jack Man I think I’ll quiz you for knowledge Said Snapper-Jack to The Brollachan Look here man I’m supposed to ask The Questions! That’s Truth Malice, That’s Truth Malice, That’s Truth Malice, Everybody think I’m crazy but your still my baby, baby It’s the truth Malice Said the Big Mire-Trog to the Mire-Man Let’s go swimming in the middle of the lake Said the Mire-Man to the Big Mire-Trog No man I’m gonner stay here on the log. That’s Truth Malice, That’s Truth Malice, That’s Truth Malice, Everybody think I’m crazy but your still my baby, baby It’s the truth Malice Said the Goblin Master Skarkill to the wench Marta Come on Baby let’s a go somewhere Said the wench Marta to the Goblin Master Skarkill If you got the money Honey I got the time. That’s Truth Malice, That’s Truth Malice, That’s Truth Malice, Everybody think I’m crazy but your still my baby, baby It’s the truth Malice

Well now I've got a girl named Stiletta She knows what to do She's just through looting' from Linghorn to Marblehead She knows how to crack runes and throw a blade or two That's my Stiletta My Little Warrior-Thief She robes from Lord F & she robes from Aesandre even Maldame & Count Brinkatore have been filched by her Never of The Opposition but neither with The Powers That Be My Stiletta is very, very, very Much of the Grey Well she can out fight Gundrada and out thieve Theodora Snitch no one knows what to do with my Stiletta, Stiletta, Stiletta Well She robes from Lord F & she robes from Aesandre even Maldame & Count Brinkatore have been filched by her When my baby finds her way into a Bullion chamber she’ll soon strip it bear So come on Stiletta, baby, let's go to Winteria I hear Aesandra’s got her some white gold Come on baby, let's go a looting again, again. Well now, Stiletta, She’s never of The Opposition but neither with The Powers That Be My Stiletta is very, very, very Much of the Grey Well She robes from Lord F & she robes from Aesandre even Maldame & Count Brinkatore have been filched by her Well she can out fight Gundrada and out thieve Theodora Snitch, She’s never of The Opposition but neither with The Powers That Be My Stiletta is very, very, very Much of the Grey She’s just my Little Warrior-Thief Stiletta Stiletta Stiletta

The first of three musical parody's from me today dedicated to 3 Rock & Roll legends who were tragically taken way to soon 55 years ago today. They may be gone nut the music NEVER died. Well the path is open and the challenge laid Have we brought our boldest and our Brightest Quest on to face the Opposition They’ll be sorely tested we know that When Tregaurd say’s, It’s Game On Quest on The clue rooms and Spin-dizzy Block & Tackle or Slice-Me-Dice Me Quest on past Hands & Skarkill Bhal-Sheba’s Hungry but Smriky’s ready fly us onwards When Tregaurd say’s, It’s Game On Quest on Well Quest on Its The Greater Game Of Luck & Glory Its for Truth & Light The forces of fear are out to stop us But with The Powers That Be we’ll win through Well Quest on Quest on and tell me Play we Fair Or Fear Play foul Just tell me You’ll be there at the allotted hour and we’ll still Quest on Well Quest on Its The Greater Game Of Luck & Glory Its for Truth & Light The forces of fear are out to stop us But with The Powers That Be we’ll win through Well Quest on Quest on and tell me Play we Fair Or Fear Play foul Just tell me You’ll be there at the allotted hour and we’ll still Quest on

Musical Parody of k.d. Lang's song used over the ending credits of the James Bond film Tomorrow Never Dies This Realm is a frozen Kingdom a place of Ice & Snow and here I am in control And Dungeoneer I have the power to end you’re quest I’ll freeze not just your body but your very soul The sorceress of Ice, Aesandre The Queen of Winteria, Aesandre I'll freeze all I see with my frost magic every level, till all of the realm is mine The Queen of Winteria Ice & cold thrill me Frost and Snow, excite me my delight lays in the bleakness of Winter The sorceress of Ice, Aesandre The Queen of Winteria, Aesandre I'll freeze all I see with my frost magic every level, till all of the realm is mine The Queen of Winteria The Dungeon Realm will bow to me and my never ending winter. The sorceress of Ice, Aesandre The Queen of Winteria, Aesandre I'll freeze all I see with my frost magic every level, till all of the realm is mine The Queen of Winteria I’m Aesandre The Queen of Winteria Aesandre The Queen of Winteria Aesandre The Queen of Winteria

God, she's adorable! I can so see this being her song actually...