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  3. They would never say...

They would never say...

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  • F
    F
    Fidjit
    wrote on last edited by
    #213

    Treguard: Oh come on team I don't need to tell you everything!

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    • S
      S
      Scott_Wilkinson
      wrote on last edited by
      #214

      Dungeoneer (Riding on Smirkenorff): Can you land?

      Smirkenorff: If you use some manners, I will.


      Dungeoneer (Riding on Smirkenorff): Abashcraft.

      Smirkenorff: What's that supposed to mean? Backwards, forwards or blast off. Speak English.

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      • ?
        ?
        Guest
        wrote on last edited by
        #215

        (dungeoneer to Smirkenoff alternate)

        Dungeoneer: Can you land?

        Smirky: Of course I CAN, It would be pretty useless if I could take off but not land. However if you mean WILL I land then you should say so, do they not teach English anymore you silly child?

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        • M
          M
          MPK
          wrote on last edited by
          #216

          Whilst we're on the theme;

          Smirky; "Alright what do you have for me? Oh great, another green gem! What I always wanted! I dont know, I just said to Elita that I thought green gems were pretty, that doesnt mean that I wanted one. And then everybody thought all they had to do to get a ride of me was to give me a green gem! I'm a dragon, what use is a green gem to a dragon?!"

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          • ?
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            Guest
            wrote on last edited by
            #217

            Elita in Shakespeare;

            Elita: Romeo Romeo, where art thou you blooming faceache.

            Romeo: It is my love

            Elita: You're smart you scumpot!

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            • S
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              Scott_Wilkinson
              wrote on last edited by
              #218

              Morghana: So, Martin, you've come this far in the dungeons, but I'll let you win. After all, there's been no winners this season.


              Smirkenorff: Sorry, I can't fly right now, I have a huge pain in my wings.


              Majida: I really like you Treguard, let's get married.

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              • ?
                ?
                Guest
                wrote on last edited by
                #219

                Think the Martin one has already been done by Zagor

                 

                Morghanna: "Ah, I'm feeling generous Martin, since no-one has won on Series 3 yet I shall let you pass without being hurt."

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                • D
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                  Drassil
                  Senior staff
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #220

                  (This one probably belongs in the Jokes thread...)

                  Pickle: 'Master, what's that scent you're wearing?'

                  Treguard: 'Hugo Boss.'

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                  • ?
                    ?
                    Guest
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #221

                    Nice one  ;D

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                      F
                      FrightKnight
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #222

                      S1:

                      Room 1:

                      Advisor: You're in a room, and there's four exits; one seems to have a skull on, another has got a quest item icon, another has got a bomb on it and there's a fire exit on the far right.

                      Dungeoneer: Well, weren't we told to always take the right path?

                      Advisor 2: I'm not sure if that's-

                      Advisor 1: Yes, let's take the fire exit...

                      (Dungeoneer goes through fire exit and ends up  backstage, near exit of studios)

                      Folly is smoking a cigarette and Lillith is flirting with one of the stage crew

                      Folly: At least one of us should not be here...

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                        Drassil
                        Senior staff
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #223

                        [Sir Hugh has fallen over in Wolfenden. Sylvester Hands walks past.]

                        Sir Hugh: I say - excuse me!

                        Hands: Yeah? What've I done?

                        Sir Hugh: Yes, hello. I've had another run-in with Hordriss. He's cast a spell so that my feet are now attached to my wrists, whilst my hands are attached to my ankles. Deucedly difficult to walk - that's why I've fallen over. I'm Sir Hugh de Wittless. Who might you be?

                        Hands: I'm Sylvester 'Ands. Y'know, 'ands, like feet, but...

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                        • ?
                          ?
                          Guest
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #224

                          Ha ha, great work. My ideas have run dry for the moment.

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                          • HStormH
                            HStormH
                            HStorm
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #225

                            I don't think this one's been done yet (and actually, now I think about, it may belong on the "I had a silly idea" thread).

                            Lord Fear:  "Any last, weak, grovelly requests before I squish you up extra crispy with a fireball, little Dungeoneer?"

                            Dungeoneer:  "Well if I have to go out, I'd like to go out on a song..."

                            Lord Fear:  "Oh how predictably pathetic. Go on then, get it over with, then I'll shrivel you down to the size of a silverfish's genital warts..."

                            Dungeoneer:   "There may be trouble aheeeead...

                            But while there's moonlight and music

                            And love and romaaaaance...

                            Let's face the music... and dance!"

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                              Fidjit
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #226

                              Dungeoneer: I think I'll just lie down here for a moment...

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                              • D
                                D
                                Drassil
                                Senior staff
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #227

                                Aesandre: Cor blimey, it's a bit taters! Brrr. I'd better stick the 'eating on.


                                [Merlin walks into the hairdressers: Haircare By Giles.]

                                Giles: Hello, Sir, what can I do for you?

                                Merlin: Ah, yes, I'm hoping for a change of style. Please give me... a Hordriss! [Merlin chuckles]

                                [Giles presses a button, and seat restraints shoot across Merlin's chair.]

                                Giles: A Pat Sharp, did you say, Sir? OK then...

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                                • M
                                  M
                                  MPK
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #228

                                  Majilda; "You know, I really am quite speechless! I dont know what to say!"  😄

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                                  • D
                                    D
                                    Drassil
                                    Senior staff
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #229

                                    Aesandre: Lord Fear, your courtship grows tiresome. I have snowmen in Winteria more appealing than you.

                                    Lord Fear: How dare you? I... I don't know what to say.

                                    Aesandre: Try expressing yourself through 1980s popular music lyrics.

                                    Lord Fear: I must say, Queen Aesandre, that [gets up and sings, with backing music kicking in] 'You're as cold as ice, you're willing to sacrifice our love...'

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                                      Scott_Wilkinson
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #230

                                      Treguard: Why don't we do what the french do on Le Chevalier du Labyrinthe for a change? Which means, if your dungeoneer loses, I pick one of you advisors to be the next dungeoneer.


                                      (Clip from Le Chevalier du Labyrinthe.)

                                      Master of the Castle: (Edited) Bouffo, why are you going to the toilet for?

                                      Bouffo (Jester): Oui Oui.

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                                      • F
                                        F
                                        Fidjit
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #231

                                        Skarkill rushing in with a laser blaster!  😄

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                                        • A
                                          A
                                          ajw68
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #232

                                          Lord Fear to Lissard: Oh damn it, I can't scare any dungeoneers today Lissard, as I am due to address the House of Lords about the Fox Hunting Bill.  Will you take charge of things in my absence?

                                          Lissard:  Most certainly your master-ness.  I will breathe my tuna breath-ness on those kids-ness.  That will knock them out instantly-ness

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