Can anybody remember...
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Why should I show the leader of the Opposition any respect? But never mind Mr. Duncan Smith, I see no reason to acknowledge Fear's lordship. All here are equal (except Nic, Forester, Adam, Kieran, Pooka, Neil and possibly some others whom I've forgotten to mention).
P.S. Please don't take this message seriously.
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Well, well, well Mrs Grimwold. I suppose I should congratulate you upon passing my little test to determine your suitability to work for me. How you summoned up the power to do so in whatever it is that passes for your brain is quite byond me, but by picking up on my deliberate errors, you have earned yourself a job. Just stay the hell away from my shoes.
As for the one who refuses to show me the proper respect, all I have to say is that he will soon see the error of his ways....
Fear
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Ohhh, your Lordship, you've made us so happy. What with the Brollachan taking up with us and all, we've been under such a terrible strain. Yes, terrible it's been. [cackle] What with Mr G. hurting his back and losing his job as an Ogre and all, and the Brollachan, well it keeps hungering, so it says. Says it wants knowledge but Mr. G. and I, well dearie we haven't got any of that. I tried cackling at it, but that did no good so we gave it some of Festus's Pedigree Chum. It got quite a taste for it and so Festus had nothing to eat, dearie. He wouldn't shurrup even when I told him to again and again. That was why he attacked your shoes, your Lordship, it won't happen again.
As for the one who won't give you your respect, your Lordship, I could try cackling at him if you want. Except if he gives me a bone or something for Festus I'd have to let him go. I could get Mr. G. to hit him if you like, but we'd need some money to get his club back from the pawnbrokers and a train fare for him to get here from Cornwall, dearie.
Just be careful of this Mr. Duncan Smith he mentions. I hear he's a powerful sorcerer able to send whole rooms full of people to sleep! And he has henchmen more evil than any of your own, dearie.
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James_Aukett: "Does that mean you'll shrivel them with a fireball your Lordship?"
Seems as though this particular mortal has a very overdeveloped sense of curiosity to me. What business is it of yours what I will do to those who disrespect me? What are you trying to gain from me by playing all nice and friendly?
In my experiences with your pathetic kind, anybody who acts like that is either trying to exploit somebody or sell them something, so which is it in your case?
And as for Mr Duncan and Mr Smith (;)), I couldn't care less what powers they may possess because neither of them is going to be any match for me.
Fear
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Does that mean you'll shrivel them with a fireball your Lordship? Â

Actually your bastardship, here's a tip: if you click on "Quote" when responding to a certain message, you need not type in the whole sentence again!
Just to try and help you retain your supreme being status.... ;D
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Oh dear, look who has a vastly overdeveloped sense of their own importance (not that I would ever be like that of course ).
I don't need tips of any kind from you, you stupid mortal, I'm sure that nothing you say could have any bearing on the way I live my life, so I would advise you to stop trying.
In a way, it's a shame, because I was actually very slightly starting to like you, but since you seem to take delight in insulting me, I guess that can be forgotten.
Fear
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Chill out your Lordship.... I just like to make people happy and hold no grudges against anyone here
I acknowledge your supreme being and have no serious intention of insulting that, just brush off anything like that as ignorant
In fact, I am a worthless little worm compared to yourself
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you want the professional opinion on why this sounds like S&M (dont ask why... just dont).
if you've ever seen a s/m couple in public (or they prefer m/s as then the master comes first) then the slave has to suck up to the master a lot in an obviously ott fashion as well as put themselves down in comparison. the master gets a kick out of it and often power trips, being mean to a lot of people because thats how they are. they can also ask the slave(s) to do self-derogatory tasks.
this is an extension of the hierarchy that was around a few hundred years ago (in knightmare's setting actually).
thats the mental side anyway. it gets more complicated when you throw in chains and polygamy but that is so off topic i am not going near it.
and they allow all this to go through but ban the word 'dickon'
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