Parody of The Subway by Chappell Roan

[Drassil]

After Grimwold the ogre bit one of Festus's heads off, the head became (what else?) a skull haunting. It then had a failed relationship with another skull haunting — and sang this song to the tune of The Subway by Chappell Roan (released in 2025). Official video, original lyrics

I saw your green glow

Mandible next to your mouth

There at the wellway

I nearly had a breakdown

Half a phase later

Saw you in the Mills of Doom

And it so chilled me

I had to leave the room

I wish the only way, it wasn't onward

When's it onward, it's never onward

It's such a lonely way, this moving onward

Moving onward, I've not moved onward

'Til I don't look for you in the bare caves

Or wish you thought that we were still ghoulmates

But I'm still coldly floating through this phase

'Til you're just another skull at the wellway

Ate Grimwold's dinner

He went and bit my head off

I see my stump and

My other heads and Mrs. G scoff

I made a promise

If in four quests my mood's further south

Well, damn this dungeon

I'm going through the serpent's mouth

I wish the only way, it wasn't onward

When's it onward, it's never onward

It's such a lonely way, this moving onward

Moving onward, I've not moved onward

'Til I can steal the scene during gameplay

And have a good refresh rate each Friday

But I'm still coldly floating through this phase

'Til you're just another skull at the wellway

You've lit, you've lit the way

You've lit the way, you've lit the way

And you flit, you flit away

You flit away, you flit away...