They would never say...
-
(On a day when the rugby is on, only KM is left. Or is it?)
Dungeoneer: Where am I?
Advisors: You're in a room, and...wait, isn't that Queen T-Bag?
Treguard: Um, so it is.
Queen T-Bag: Where are the sunstones of Montezuma?
Treguard: You are too late. Your programme isn't on today.
Pat Sharp: Welcome to Fun house!
Treguard: And you can go away too!
Pat Sharp: Watch it, beardie, or I'll get the girls to gunge you.
Treguard: I bet that's not even a real mullet. (Pulls hair) Look, it's just fake.
Pat Sharp: OW! Stop that! It's real! I bet your beard is fake (starts pulling beard)
Treguard: Ouch! Why you- (continues)
Pickle: Sorry i'm late, master, bu-wha-?
Queen T-Bag: Ooh, I've always liked a man with odd eyebrows.
Pickle: Gulp
Advisors: I think we'd best go home.
Dungeoneer: Hello? Where am I? Where is everyone? Hello?
Announcer of Dangermouse: And so, the sun sets of another adventure. Tune in next week for another episode of Fun-Mare! I mean Knight-mouse! I mean...oh forget it. I wonder if that job as a BBC weatherman is still available...?
-
Lord Fear - "You haven't had much food recently, have you Ben? Well, I hate to see people die, so, have this loaf of bread."
Treguard - "Here, Majida, you sit in my chair now. After all, you are carrying my baby."
Motley - "Hmm, I wonder if it's about time I started telling rude jokes for a change."
-
Elita: Hello! My, you're looking good today. Isn't everything wonderful? But enogh about my opinions. Would you like this green gem stone? Julius Scaramonger gave it to me in a fit of generousity.
-
Treguard: 'Team, the Eye Shield is currently at the blacksmith's for repairs, so here instead is the Nose Shield. Now, when you find a spyglass, hold it up in front of the Nose Shield, and we'll finally be able to discover what aftershave Lord Fear uses.'
Pickle: 'If any.'
Little Miss Muffet: 'Where am I?'
Little Jack Horner: 'OK, LMM, you're in like a room with a rocky ledge, and just ahead of you there's what seems like a low stool of some kind. There's something on it so can you walk forward? ... Stop. Can you see the stool?'
LMM: 'Yeah. I think it's a tuffet.'
Little Red Riding Hood: 'What's on it?'
LMM: 'Some food... whey, and curds.'
Treguard: 'Caution, Team, don't dally in this place; danger is approaching.'
Little Tommy Tucker: 'OK, put the food in your knapsack.'
[Instead, LMM sits down and begins to eat the food.]
LRRH: 'What are you doing?!'
LMM: 'This is my favourite food, I'm not gonna shove it in a bag, alright?'
Treguard: 'Warning! This is Ariadne's lair...'
[Ariadne has crawled over to LMM. The Advisors scream at her. LMM gets up and away just in time.]
[Fidjit comes up to a Series 7 Dungeoneer.]
Fidjit: 'Hello there, Fidjit's the name.'
Dungeoneer: 'Look, Mr. Valentine - or may I call you Paul? - why don't you just: creep back to your dressing room; slip into your Motley outfit; come back; and we'll say no more about it, eh?'
-
Brollachan: You got the answer to the riddle wrong.
Pickle: We mustn't get too involved.
Majida: I like you, Treguard.
Gideon: Must watch my language.
Ridolfo:
Cedric: You look handsome.
Gumboil: No more for me, I'm driving.
Dooris: WAHEEEEEEYYY!!!
Lord Fear: I got it wrong.
Igneous: I respect your intelligence.
Me: I like season six.
-
Cedric beats his stick over the dungeoneers head:
Dungeoneer: OUCH!
Advisor: Come on that didn't hurt!
Dungeoneer: groan urrnngggh!
Advisors: Are you alright?
Dungeoneer: No, the stick sort of went through the helmet into my head...
Treguard: CEDRIC! How many times have I told you not to use a crowbar...
Cedric: That wasn't a crowbar that was a scaffolding pole!
-
Lord Fear: Well then, i was going to stand here and do a long and pointless speech and taunt you, thus giving you time to defeat me, however I have discovered this invention
Pulls Out Gun
LF: So I will just ice you instead!
What shall I BANG! Oh lord, i'm bleeedingA: Hey, that's cheating
Guys I am bleeding to death hereA: We don't care about you we want a Frightnight trophy
Pickle: Well master, it looks like Lord Fear must be taught a lesson
Treguard: Yes Pickle, bring me my shotgun....
-
S4
Mogdred: Hmm I sense a disturbance in the force
Motley: Perhaps in S5 you are going to be replaced by a different villain with incompetant henchmen and the ability to sit and stare into a spyglass for ages. Someone who has a ridiculously badguylike name such as Lord Fear
Prolonged Silence
Mogdred: actually i meant the curry I had last night. They won't replace me willl they Sniff I need this job, I just put in an order for 4000 new goblins. I mean in 4 season I have been in charge 2 have had no winners.
TC: Erm John would you come here a moment
Mogdred: John? There is no John here mortal. Look upon Mogred and quake
TC: Riiight, well look upon your dissmisal and quake!
-
Julius Scaramounger:
"OH Helow There. Right then Dungeoneer I was going to try and sell you something total uselass, BUT instead I'll give you what you need to complet this level.
AND It's FREE OF CHARGE.
**Skarkill To Richard **(S5)
"Thats A Goblain Horn That.... But You Tryed Realy hard to convince Me It Was Magic..... Oh What The Heck Go On get Out of here I'll Let You Go.
-
Majida: "I like dees puzzle. It really easy and dunjin-ear has nice clear view of whole room."
Say Emii, did you get the idea for this from the "backwards day" at the end of season two?
Anyway, I want put a transcript of this topic on my website as it's ideal for the sort of articles I usually put up there. That okay with everyone?
-
Yeah, I've got no problems with it
I did some forum roaming to find out what other fan based forums do for fun (other fan bases, mind) and decided to nick some ideas. Other things that have been done, past or present, are:
Things you will never SEE in the dungeons
You know someone's been messing with the dungeons when...
and
A Great Knightmare Joke
There undoubtedly more - if people would like to remember them and let this good person HStorm know I'm sure he'd be very grateful
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