Knightmare logo
  • Characters
    Powers that Be Opposition Unaligned
  • Dungeon
    Handpainted CGI Locations
  • Backstage
    Experiences Interviews History How Knightmare was made Convention
  • Fanzone
    Online Coverage Articles Magazines Fan projects
  • Series
    Series 2 Series 3 Series 4 Series 5 Series 6 Series 7 Series 8 Geek Week International Knightmare VR Series 1
  • Events
    Pre-2021 2021 2022 2023 2024 2025 2026
Skip to content
  • Categories
  • Recent
  • Tags
  • Popular
  • Users
  • Groups
Collapse
  1. Home
  2. Jester's Corner
  3. They would never say...

They would never say...

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Jester's Corner
431 Posts 58 Posters 0 Views
  • Oldest to Newest
  • Newest to Oldest
  • Most Votes
Reply
  • Reply as topic
Log in to reply
This topic has been deleted. Only users with topic management privileges can see it.
  • PookaP
    PookaP
    Pooka
    wrote on last edited by
    #322

    Hordriss: "I'm Hordriss."

    1 Reply Last reply
    0
    • D
      D
      darkDescender
      wrote on last edited by
      #323

      Treguard: Try to get your combat multiplier even higher...

      1 Reply Last reply
      0
      • F
        F
        Fidjit
        wrote on last edited by
        #324

        Dungeoneer lobs a grenade at Bumptious' mine!

        1 Reply Last reply
        0
        • F
          F
          Fidjit
          wrote on last edited by
          #325

          Wall monster: The blood red stone will bring bloodshed

          Dungeoneer: Catch this!

          Dungeoneer: Now we see blood red stone!

          ##########################################

          Wall monster: The After Eight Mints must be used accordingly...

          Advisor: What happened, these were for the troll...

          Treguard: It wasn't After Eight was it team

          ##########################################

          Dungeoneer: Why are you upset Sylvester... Oh yes! It's November, it's nearly time for you're bath!

          1 Reply Last reply
          0
          • D
            D
            darkDescender
            wrote on last edited by
            #326

            Team reaches level 3, but instead of Marblehead...

            Treguard: Extreme danger, team! This is Lord Fear's latest innovation, he calls it The Technodrome!

            1 Reply Last reply
            0
            • D
              D
              darkDescender
              wrote on last edited by
              #327

              Lissard: Lissard calling Lordnesss! Come in, Lordness!

              Fear: Ah, Lissard. And what have you learned today?

              L: I've learned that love is a tricksy path, Lordness.

              F: No, what have you learned about the current quest?

              L: Oh! Er...the dungeoneer's male, Lordness?

              Treguard: (watching through spyglass) Ah, lovely! A parody of Mork and Mindy.

              1 Reply Last reply
              0
              • D
                D
                Drassil
                Senior staff
                wrote on last edited by
                #328

                Treguard: 'Ooh nasty, what a pity, never mind.'


                [Treguard gets his first glimpse of a causeway in operation.]

                Treguard: 'A causeway! Ground breaking.'

                Pickle: 'Boom boom.'

                1 Reply Last reply
                0
                • F
                  F
                  Fidjit
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #329

                  Sylvester Hands approaches a dungeoneer with a magic rope...

                  Dungeoneer: (Dave Lister style) Wha's that pal, you startin' trouble!

                  1 Reply Last reply
                  0
                  • M
                    M
                    MoanaLiza
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #330

                    Sly to Lissard: "You stink"

                    Lissard: "I'm an atlantean, I come from the sssssea. Now what'ssss your excusssssse?"

                    Lissard and Sly: "We ssssmell!"

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    0
                    • T
                      T
                      Thanatos
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #331

                      The Dreadnought: "Hello, sir. I am C-3PO, human-cyborg relations."

                      1 Reply Last reply
                      0
                      • D
                        D
                        darkDescender
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #332

                        Treguard: "Join us again for Knightmare. Until next time, good pie!"

                        Or...

                        "Join us again for Knightmare. Until next time, Good guy!"

                        Or...

                        "Join us again for Knightmare. Until next time, Good fry!"

                        1 Reply Last reply
                        0
                        • HarveyTowersH
                          HarveyTowersH
                          HarveyTowers
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #333

                          Mogdred: "Your only hope to reach level three now is to pledge yourself to me, and come as my servant. Well, will you pledge yourself to me? We need a twelth man out here! Come on, let's be having you!"

                          The Delia Smith School of Public Speaking - Now Taking Resitrations

                          1 Reply Last reply
                          0
                          • T
                            T
                            TheBrollachan
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #334

                            Brollachan: "I hunger, why don't you feed me with some rock cakes"

                            1 Reply Last reply
                            0
                            • D
                              D
                              darkDescender
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #335

                              As the mine cart crashes in level Three, Mogdred appears

                              Mogdred: (anguished) 40 Years! I've had my no claims bonus insurance for 40 years! 40 Years! 40 Years!

                              Mogdred proceeds to follow the dungeoneer throughout the remainder of the quest, wailing "40 years!" over and over

                              1 Reply Last reply
                              0
                              • 1
                                1
                                123Pooka
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #336

                                Bhal Shebah:

                                "Now the only question is: chilled or frozen?"

                                1 Reply Last reply
                                0
                                • T
                                  T
                                  TuragaNuju
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #337

                                  Wall Puzzle -

                                  "What is the Quadratic Equation Of celsius Pie?"

                                  Guard: Halt - None Shall Pass Without Gold

                                  Dungeoneer: I have gold for you

                                  Gives Gold To Guard

                                  Dungeoneer Tries To Pass

                                  Guard: NONE SHALL PASS WITHOUT GOLD

                                  Dungeoneer: But I Just Gave You The Gold

                                  Guard: No, You Need To HAVE The Gold To Pass.

                                  Gives Gold Back

                                  Guard: Shall We Try This Again?

                                  Treguard: Err... Cauppacinno with some of those cheesy biscuits..

                                  1 Reply Last reply
                                  0
                                  • F
                                    F
                                    Fidjit
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #338

                                    Or "Nice Tea!"

                                    1 Reply Last reply
                                    0
                                    • F
                                      F
                                      Fidjit
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #339

                                      http://knightmare.com/series/3/170.jpg

                                      "I can't believe its not butter!" I like that one!

                                      1 Reply Last reply
                                      0
                                      • D
                                        D
                                        Drassil
                                        Senior staff
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #340

                                        Lissard to Lord Fear: 'Sssssso long, and thanksssss for all the fish.'

                                        1 Reply Last reply
                                        0
                                        • D
                                          D
                                          darkDescender
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #341

                                          Brother Mace: "Resistance is useless!"

                                          On a side note, I urge all right-thinking Knightmare fans to watch Hitchhikers Guide on BBC2 tonight (10th May 2005) As Michael Cule, Rayner Bourton and David Learner all appear in tonight's episode.

                                          1 Reply Last reply
                                          0

                                          Hello! It looks like you're interested in this conversation, but you don't have an account yet.

                                          Getting fed up of having to scroll through the same posts each visit? When you register for an account, you'll always come back to exactly where you were before, and choose to be notified of new replies (either via email, or push notification). You'll also be able to save bookmarks and upvote posts to show your appreciation to other community members.

                                          With your input, this post could be even better 💗

                                          Register Login
                                          Reply
                                          • Reply as topic
                                          Log in to reply
                                          • Oldest to Newest
                                          • Newest to Oldest
                                          • Most Votes


                                          • Login

                                          • Don't have an account? Register

                                          • Login or register to search.

                                          The Team

                                          Join
                                          Submissions
                                          Contact
                                          KM Chat
                                          Privacy Policy

                                          The Site

                                          About
                                          Search
                                          Site Map
                                          Terms & Conditions
                                          Q&A

                                          Keep up-to-date with Knightmare news:
                                          Visit KnightmareTV on X Visit KnightmareTV on Facebook Visit KnightmareTV on YouTube Receive Browser Notifications See our RSS Feed
                                          © Copyright Knightmare.com 1999-2026. All Rights Reserved. Moral rights are asserted.
                                          • First post
                                            Last post
                                          0
                                          • Categories
                                          • Recent
                                          • Tags
                                          • Popular
                                          • Users
                                          • Groups