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  3. They would never say...

They would never say...

Scheduled Pinned Locked Moved Jester's Corner
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    Thanatos
    wrote on last edited by
    #331

    The Dreadnought: "Hello, sir. I am C-3PO, human-cyborg relations."

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      darkDescender
      wrote on last edited by
      #332

      Treguard: "Join us again for Knightmare. Until next time, good pie!"

      Or...

      "Join us again for Knightmare. Until next time, Good guy!"

      Or...

      "Join us again for Knightmare. Until next time, Good fry!"

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      • HarveyTowersH
        HarveyTowersH
        HarveyTowers
        wrote on last edited by
        #333

        Mogdred: "Your only hope to reach level three now is to pledge yourself to me, and come as my servant. Well, will you pledge yourself to me? We need a twelth man out here! Come on, let's be having you!"

        The Delia Smith School of Public Speaking - Now Taking Resitrations

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          TheBrollachan
          wrote on last edited by
          #334

          Brollachan: "I hunger, why don't you feed me with some rock cakes"

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            darkDescender
            wrote on last edited by
            #335

            As the mine cart crashes in level Three, Mogdred appears

            Mogdred: (anguished) 40 Years! I've had my no claims bonus insurance for 40 years! 40 Years! 40 Years!

            Mogdred proceeds to follow the dungeoneer throughout the remainder of the quest, wailing "40 years!" over and over

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              123Pooka
              wrote on last edited by
              #336

              Bhal Shebah:

              "Now the only question is: chilled or frozen?"

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                TuragaNuju
                wrote on last edited by
                #337

                Wall Puzzle -

                "What is the Quadratic Equation Of celsius Pie?"

                Guard: Halt - None Shall Pass Without Gold

                Dungeoneer: I have gold for you

                Gives Gold To Guard

                Dungeoneer Tries To Pass

                Guard: NONE SHALL PASS WITHOUT GOLD

                Dungeoneer: But I Just Gave You The Gold

                Guard: No, You Need To HAVE The Gold To Pass.

                Gives Gold Back

                Guard: Shall We Try This Again?

                Treguard: Err... Cauppacinno with some of those cheesy biscuits..

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                  Fidjit
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #338

                  Or "Nice Tea!"

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                    Fidjit
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #339

                    http://knightmare.com/series/3/170.jpg

                    "I can't believe its not butter!" I like that one!

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                      Drassil
                      Senior staff
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #340

                      Lissard to Lord Fear: 'Sssssso long, and thanksssss for all the fish.'

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                        darkDescender
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #341

                        Brother Mace: "Resistance is useless!"

                        On a side note, I urge all right-thinking Knightmare fans to watch Hitchhikers Guide on BBC2 tonight (10th May 2005) As Michael Cule, Rayner Bourton and David Learner all appear in tonight's episode.

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                          Drassil
                          Senior staff
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #342

                          Treguard: 'Oooh, https://www.bing.com/mapspreview?mmclassic=browse&lat=51.9012&lon=-0.0278&scale=100000&icon=x !'


                          Treguard: 'This is your knapsack - that's right, sling it over your shoulder - for any food you find. It will restore your energy, but in this phase of the Dungeon, it's not without waste. So here is your crapsack. When it feels full, be sure to empty it, or you risk Life Force damage...'


                          Treguard: Come in, stranger!

                          [Instead of a child, Richard O'Brien enters, followed by six breathless, shell-suited adults.]

                          Richard: Righto, team, what will the next game in the Mediaeval Zone be?

                          Team captain: Uh... I think we'll have a Mystery...

                          Richard: A Mystery game! And who's to play this Mystery game?

                          Team captain: Uh... Shaun!

                          Richard: Shaun to play a Mystery game!

                          [Richard drags one of the team across the antechamber, to the Dungeon entrance. The others run over too, and giggle. He pulls a sand-timer out of his jacket.]

                          Richard: Shaun, you have two minutes from the very second you're through the door. Go!

                          [Shaun is pushed into the Dungeon. The others watch on the magic mirror as he appears in the Corridor of Blades, and all shout at once. Treguard groans.]

                          Richard: [Turning to Treguard.] Oh, it's not so bad. It could have been a Fort Boyard crossover. [Begins to play his harmonica.]

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                            123Pooka
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #343

                            Brilliant Drassil! I can picture it all in my head- two great elements of knightmare and crystal maze in one.

                            lol Richard O'Brien might seem a little insensitive if he was to continue playing that harmonica when poor old shaun bites the blades. Then again, it would be great if he were to do a harmonica encore to 'ooh nasty'.

                            Back to they would never say:

                            Treguard in antechamber: Pickle! Don't worry yourself, I'll get it.

                            Pickle: No! I insist master I'll get the questbook.

                            Treguard: No, I'll get it.

                            Pickle: No, I always keep the watchers updated on quest progress master its my job.

                            Treguard: Its ok, I'll get it.

                            They simultaneously grab the book and start having a tug of war over the pages- gradually ripping the book to shreds

                            By this time, the advisors are already fed up with waiting and on their way home.

                            Treguard: Ahhhh, they've gone, we can stop our pretend fighting now. A day off from being dungeonmaster at last.

                            Pickle: A day off from being your ****** assistant!

                            Treguard: shush elf or I really will rip your ears off next time!

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                              TuragaNuju
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #344

                              Enter... Stranger

                              Tregurad looks puzzled... there is no dungeneer at the door

                              Thats strange, where is the dungeoneer?

                              The advisors all look at Treguard, then at the door

                              What, Is there something on my shoe?

                              Treguard looks down, and there is a reeeeaaally small person in the doorway

                              Oh.... Err

                              Pulls out pocket radio

                              This is roger niner Tetley Bravo, we need a smaller helmet over...

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                                Drassil
                                Senior staff
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #345

                                Pickle: [Addressing the Watchers] I say, you lot. Don't go.

                                Treguard: What's the matter, you silly sprite? I thought you didn't like the Watchers.

                                Pickle: I get lonely trying to sleep here, Master. It's worse than an NES hospital ward.

                                Treguard: NES?

                                Pickle: National Elf Service.

                                Treguard: [Keeling over at the awful pun] Aaagh... now I need a hospital. Will the NES have a bed for me?

                                Pickle: There is a bed. There's always a bed. But it won't be easy to find...

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                                  TuragaNuju
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #346

                                  I thin I need a doctor too after that one.

                                  Treguard probably wouldnt shout MONKEY! at the Dungeoneer every time they took a step

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                                    MoanaLiza
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #347

                                    "Get a life" after dungeoneer succums to death.

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                                      Becxsmagic
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #348

                                      Lord Fear would not came to the antechamber singing Rainbow's "I surrender"

                                      Nor would he say "My car's broken down. Can I use your phone and where's the bathroom?"

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                                        darkDescender
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #349

                                        I was just looking through some of the older pages of this thread, and I just realized, no-one got zzt's 'barrel roll' reference back on page 24! It's lylat Wars, isn't it? It is, isn't it?

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                                        • K
                                          K
                                          keeds
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #350

                                          From the early series-

                                          Treguard-"I assume you have some previous experience of quests?"

                                          Dungeoneer- "Yes, I do."

                                          Treguard-"I don't believe you. In these PC days when kids are not even allowed to play conkers at school, I fail to believe you have expereince of tackling catacombites, drunken knights and mystic floating bombs, now get out of my sight for lying!"

                                          In Lilith's chamber-

                                          Lilith"What do you bring me to pass?"

                                          Dungeoneer-"You live in a rocky cave with no furniture, I fail to belive your standard of living will be improved by a ruby or silken glove"

                                          On encountering Mogdred (RIP John)

                                          Mogdred-"Look upon Mogdred and quail!"

                                          Dungeoneer-"I am wearing a helmet that prevents me from seeing anything that is more that 4 steps away, and besides, that hat removes any fear that your voice can enduce"

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