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  3. Any three in the world

Any three in the world

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  • I
    I
    Ironlord
    wrote on last edited by
    #5

    I'd choose MC Hammer to be the spellcaster, as being a rapper, he'll easily spellcast quick enough to get me out of a tight situation, even if the spell's FLOCCINAUCINIHILIPILIFICATION.

    You watched Catchword when it was on, didn't you? Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis, that was their other favourite word.

    Paul Coia for the next host of Countdown! Hang on - Des got the gig. Arse.

    Another interesting point: here's a revised plot from series 3. (NOTE: I only ever saw bits and pieces of this series, as you all know by now, and that was back in 1989. If this scene is not accurate... I can't help it!)

    McGrew: "Och! I'll chop ye're heed off!"

    Dungeoneer: shits pants "Aargh! What am I going to do?"

    Advisor 1: "Use the spell!"

    Advisor 2: "Spellcasting! H-A-M-M-E-R-T-I-M-E!"

    jangly spellcasting noise

    inoffensive rap music starts playing

    McGrew Dances

    McGrew: "Och! Och! Make it stop! I'll do anything!"

    Team: nothing

    Dungeoneer: walks off into next room

    whap (standard moving-through-rooms noise)

    Sword: jangly sword noise jangly sword noise jangly sword noise (etc)

    Lifeforce: descending

    Lifeforce: turns into a huge skull that fills the screen

    Bells: BONG! BONG!

    You know what's coming next...

    Treguard: Ooooh... nasty!

    Someone HAS to make this reality. Flash, video editing... something!

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    • P
      P
      PhoenixFlame
      wrote on last edited by
      #6

      Hmm, well, i'd take my boyfriend with me to calm me down when I panic one of his best mates cos he's really good at strategies etc and Treguard cos he would know all the dungeons! Kinda cheating I know, but you did say anyone!

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      • HStormH
        HStormH
        HStorm
        wrote on last edited by
        #7

        Not cheating any more than I was by saying Dr Who.

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        • P
          P
          PhoenixFlame
          wrote on last edited by
          #8

          Heh, I guess so, but it would give me an unfair advantage!

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          • S
            S
            Snowwiewolf
            wrote on last edited by
            #9

            Ironlord is right someone make that scene real!

            Tony Kakko, just as an exuse to meet me idol plus he's funny and would calm me down when I panic.

            Janne Ahola (singer of Teräsbetoni) to be the spellcaster. Him spellcasting with that high pitched voice of his would make the enemies die of laughter.

            Alexi "Wildchild" Laiho to be the guide. He'd propably scare even Lord Fear with his abuse of words and his "horrific" voice.

            The bad thing is:

            Tony would propaly guide me in to a pit for the fun of it

            I'd be deaf after hearing Alexi and Janne yell orders and spells...

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            • HStormH
              HStormH
              HStorm
              wrote on last edited by
              #10

              No dagger-throwers to bombard the goblins with then...?

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              • S
                S
                Snowwiewolf
                wrote on last edited by
                #11

                Well if I could have four advisors

                Nah, I'd propably ask someone from here

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                • I
                  I
                  Ironlord
                  wrote on last edited by
                  #12

                  Tony Kakko, just as an exuse to meet me idol plus he's funny and would calm me down when I panic.

                  Are you sure?

                  (heavy Finnish accent)

                  "OK, Snowwiewolf, you're outside in the forest, with a very hairy man in front of you. (Say it's Olaf, who's managed to escape from series 2). Full moon is on the sky and... he's not a man anymore! Run away, run away, run away!"

                  (Anyone who doesn't get this - i.e. everyone else - might want to look at: http://www.darklyrics.com/lyrics/sonataarctica/ecliptica.html#6)

                  Janne Ahola (singer of Teräsbetoni) to be the spellcaster. Him spellcasting with that high pitched voice of his would make the enemies die of laughter.

                  Yes, I can see that one as well... Snowwiewolf is threatened by Ariadne, and is facing certain death until Janne sends his heroes in to intervene.

                  Spellcasting! M-A-N-O-W-A-R!

                  jangly spell noise

                  Four almost-naked men appear, wearing only loincloths and with their entire bodies covered in baby oil. One has a permanent scowl on his face. They pick up their swords, and attempt to slay the imminent danger. The scowling one howls "We will never lay down our arms until the enemies of metal are defeated!" while Ariadne crawls up behind him and eats him whole. He dies, heroically, in battle, along with the three others, when it would have been a far better idea to actually win the battle.

                  At this point, Pickle intervenes, and sends in Thyrfing to get the job done properly.

                  Alexi "Wildchild" Laiho to be the guide. He'd propably scare even Lord Fear with his abuse of words and his "horrific" voice.

                  Snowwiewolf: "Where am I?"

                  Alexi: "YOW! You're in Lake Bodom! YOW!"

                  Snowwiewolf: "Alexi, could you stop screaming in my ear?"

                  Alexi: "YOW!"

                  The bad thing is:

                  Tony would propaly guide me in to a pit for the fun of it

                  I'd be deaf after hearing Alexi and Janne yell orders and spells...

                  Alternatively: Tony's voice fails to reach you through the helmet (probably due to messrs. Ahola and Laiho) and would throw a massive strop about the poor sound quality...

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                  • M
                    M
                    Mykell
                    wrote on last edited by
                    #13

                    I think it'd be more fun being an adviser than it would be being the dungeoneer. I'd send the person I hated most in and then slice him up like a piece of... pie in the corridor of blades.

                    evil cackle.

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                    • HStormH
                      HStormH
                      HStorm
                      wrote on last edited by
                      #14

                      All right, let's follow that tangent for a moment... who would you most like to be the dungeoneer you could guide into peril?

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                      • D
                        D
                        darkDescender
                        wrote on last edited by
                        #15

                        For my advisors, Richard O'Brien (just cos I want to meet him in person) Mark Lamar, (sarcasm is the strongest weapon known to man) and Tom Baker. (With his lovely commanding voice)

                        Dungeoneer to guide into peril/certain death? Easy.

                        Ed. Tudor. Pole.

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                        • P
                          P
                          PhoenixFlame
                          wrote on last edited by
                          #16

                          LOL, guess you're not a fan then? Hmm, I would probably put in Bush cos it'd be funny seeing him try to talk to the people in the dungeon and not understanding them, does that make me cruel?

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                          • HStormH
                            HStormH
                            HStorm
                            wrote on last edited by
                            #17

                            "Where am ah?"

                            "You're in a room with..."

                            "A room?!? A room?!? I'm not in an oilfield?"

                            "Er, no. Ahead of you there's..."

                            "There any folks in here?"

                            "Yeah, there's..."

                            "Well let's not dance round the ol' bush - an' ah don't just mean muh daddy when ah say that - let's talk to 'em. Hey you thar! Ah'm on the quest for an awful lot o' oil and any Eye-Shields of Mass Destruction. You got any?"

                            "GRAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHH!"

                            "As I was saying, George, there's a huge monster with yellow skin, pointy teeth and a single gleaming eye, and it's drooling hungrily."

                            "Ah, Dick Cheney! Who'd a thunk ah'd run into you down here..."

                            And so on.

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                            • P
                              P
                              PhoenixFlame
                              wrote on last edited by
                              #18

                              LOL, yeah! He'd probably have Tony Blair as an advisor as well!

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                              • HStormH
                                HStormH
                                HStorm
                                wrote on last edited by
                                #19

                                Hmm, maybe we could turn it into an interactive story, might be a laugh...

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                                • S
                                  S
                                  Snowwiewolf
                                  wrote on last edited by
                                  #20

                                  @Ironlord:

                                  I scared my mum by laughing too loudly

                                  One thing my mom wants to know: How do you know so much about finnish heavy?

                                  I'd like to have my old french teacher as the dungeneer. Say hello to the goblins Tarja, ask them if they'd like to learn frech recipies! Mwah ha haa!

                                  And I'd like ? ? to be one of the advisors (so I could steal a kiss from him while everyone is watching my french teacher get eaten)

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                                  • I
                                    I
                                    Ironlord
                                    wrote on last edited by
                                    #21

                                    @Ironlord:

                                    I scared my mum by laughing too loudly

                                    One thing my mom wants to know: How do you know so much about finnish heavy?

                                    http://www.last.fm/users/nimbostratus

                                    And that's just in the last month. I have more Finnish metal than is healthy and it's been on my playlist for the last year and a half to the near-exclusion of just about anything else.

                                    Blame the people who introduced me to Ensiferum. Also blame the people in and around Nottingham who invented the "Full Moon Dance" that has already been exported to a few other rock clubs round the country...

                                    I'll send you a link at some stage.

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                                    • S
                                      S
                                      Snowwiewolf
                                      wrote on last edited by
                                      #22

                                      links not working...

                                      Full moon dance?!

                                      If you ever get the chance to come to Finland go to either Duck Rock, Tuska or F.M.E great bands, grat food (at duck rock), Heavy Karaoke!

                                      Actually If you ever do come to Finland send meh an e-mail

                                      I just watched Die Hard

                                      Karl (long blonde hair, baddie) he'd propably avenge meh if I lost.

                                      Mrs. Mclane: She's just as aggressive as me when needed. Proapbly a good spell caster.

                                      John Mclane: He can keep his mind clear in extreme situations. Only problem is he and Karl would try and kill each other....

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                                      • I
                                        I
                                        Ironlord
                                        wrote on last edited by
                                        #23

                                        links not working...

                                        http://www.last.fm/user/nimbostratus was what I meant to put. The overall Finnishness has just been reduced with the massive amount of Forefather I've been playing, though.

                                        Currently enjoying Sonata Arctica howl their way through Die With Your Boots On. I really should dig out more of the old Maiden classics.

                                        Full moon dance?!

                                        Check your email - soon. It needs a good deal of explanation...

                                        If you ever get the chance to come to Finland go to either Duck Rock, Tuska or F.M.E great bands, grat food (at duck rock), Heavy Karaoke!

                                        I've considered Tuska, but that'll have to wait until next year. In terms of great Finnish food, I've got some kylmäsavuporonpaisti in the fridge...

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                                        • S
                                          S
                                          Snowwiewolf
                                          wrote on last edited by
                                          #24

                                          Actually by great food i meant french fires, chicken, octopus rings....

                                          When you do go to Tuska mail me, you'll get a good friend to enjoy the festival with

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